‘David...David...’

I ran. Running from nothing was tiresome, but I persevered. I wasn’t about to let the nothingness attack me. Singing my favourite song for comfort was the only thing that was keeping me calm. The lyrics went something like this...

‘I found a reason for me,
To change who I used to be.
A reason to start over new.
And the reason is you.’

The song held great meaning for me, and provided with the determination to keep going. I was doing it for her. I wasn’t about to die here before I told her. I wouldn’t dream of it.

‘David...David...’

The nothingness was closing in. I could feel its cold lifeless breath on the back of my neck, and every slight snap of a twig or rustling of leaves in the forest sent shivers down my spine. The whole wood was against me.

I ducked behind a nearby gathering of trees and tried to catch my breath. The oxygen tasted sweet on my tongue and that moment of happiness made me feel grateful for my lungs.

‘David....David...’

‘Im not a perfect person,
There are many things I wish I didn’t do.
But I consider you learning
I never meant to do those things to you.
And so I have to say
Before I go...’

The next verse rolled off my lips like bitter-sweet poetry, but I didn’t have time to dwell on it.

‘David....David...’

Slumping against a tree and sliding down until I hit the floor, I pushed my hand through my tangled hair. I’d been running like this for three days and the pain was unbearable.

I threw my head in my hands and cried inconsolably “Why did it have to be like this!” I screamed to no one in particular. I stood up tears still streaming down my face and faced the nothingness.

‘David....David...’ the nothingness howled again. “LEAVE ME ALONE!!” I yelled still sobbing

I put my hand in my pocket and pulled out the grimy silver machine and aimed it at the enemy.

I pulled the trigger and the machine howled sending the bullet whizzing through the air. The nothingness exploded into a chorus of ‘David...David...’ and diminuendo as voice began to tear off the chorus one by one. Soon only a single female voice could be heard.

I had done it. I could stop running. I was free.

‘David...’ the woman cried ‘Why?’

I froze recognising the voice “Is...is that you?” I questioned slowly walking toward the voice.

The Nothingness retreated, and stood in its place was her. My wife. I had shot her.

I ran forward throwing the gun at my feet and caught her as she fell elegantly to the ground.

I didn’t believe I killed my wife. I sat in shock and whispered in her ear my favourite verses of the song, rocking her back and forward slowly attempting to find some comfort in the lifeless shell.

Slowly and carefully I set her down on earth and picked up the gun and looked up to the sky, “I wasn’t meant for this world...I think you know that don’t you?” I said as I pressed the gun to my head and pulled the trigger.

I woke with the bleep of a heart monitor beside me and my hand going purple from how tight Roxxie was holding it. The room stank of disinfectant and I knew exactly where I was. I turned to face Roxxie whose face currently looking at the floor. Her long black hair down too her shoulder was a mess and her eyes looked stung from all the crying. I attempted to grip her hand but it was that numb and I was that weak that it was impossible. So I tried the better approach “nuha....” I groaned in an attempt to get her attention. She immediately looked up and hugged me. Her embrace was tight but I endured it.

It seemed as if I had lost my power of hearing as I watched her lips move but no sound come out, but my lip reading skills were excellent. She was singing my favourite song. It must have been her talking to me during the coma!

It was all too much for me and my body was unable to cope. I needed sleep. As I drifted back into the nothingness I was no longer afraid.

I know the nothingness is just Roxxie.